"Takers" - in theaters

I swear that I've seen this movie advertised for over a year. I think it was supposed to come out last winter, but since one of the stars was accused of beating up his girlfriend, I understand the studio's hesitation.

"Takers" revolves around a group of bank robbers who are very good at what they do. Each has their own specialty, much like the gang from the "Italian Job" (which they reference), and each has his own "Come what may" attitude.

That all changes when one of their old friends gets out of prison. Ghost, played by T.I. (at his sleazy best), took the fall for the group a few years back, and didn't turn them in. And now that he's out he wants to pull a multi-million dollar heist in the span of a few days. The rest of the crew is hesitant, seeing as how Ghost is so eager. They're also wary seeing as how Ghost could still send them up the river if he felt like it.

Michael Ealy's character, Jake, is now engaged to Ghost's ex-girlfriend Rachel (Zoe Saldana). He has a day job of running an old-school, 20's gangster-like nightclub, and mostly uses his bank money to support that. His kid brother, Jesse (played by the infamous Chris Brown), is following in his brother's footsteps, and his character isn't developed much beyond that.

For once, I found myself actually liking a character that Idris Elba plays. His story arc involves taking care of his sister who is in rehab for drug addiction. It was very redeeming, the idea of a bank robber with a conscience.

I'm not entirely sure what Paul Walker's character's role was, but he walked around in expensive suits and talked on his Bluetooth to the crew, so I have to assume he was important. Mostly, he's just pretty to look at.

A lot of people hate on Hayden Christensen, but I gotta say, his character was somewhat awesome for a few simple reasons: 1) he didn't whine, 2) he was covered in tatooes and tended to wear tight white tanktops, 3) he kicked ass, and 4) he played the piano. You can also tell that he had a lot of fun making this movie which in turn helped his performance.

So on the CWeave scale, I rate this movie a 6.5. While individually I enjoyed most of the characters, as a group there wasn't much of a spark. If more of the actors had loosened up, I think that this could've been a really fun, really enjoyable heist movie. But oh well. After all, hindsight is 20/20.

"The Losers" - in theaters

I was pretty excited to see this movie (though looking back on it, I'm pretty excited to see every movie), because I enjoy a good action/comedy. And that's what I found "The Losers" to be: pretty darn good.

The story centers around a group of covert ops soldiers who knew too much and had to be eliminated. Of course, the elimination didn't go as planned, and what really happened was that they all got ticked off (not to mention stuck in Bolivia). Then all of a sudden, Zoe Saldana shows up, claims she can find the guy who set up them (named Max, played by Jason Patric) as long as in the end, Max meets his maker.

The leader of this rag-tag group of soldiers is Clay (played by Jeffrey Dean Morgan). It's tough to figure out Clay's MO throughout the film, other than the fact that a lot of his actions seem to be guided by his penis. The romance that blossomed between his character and Zoe Saldana's was somewhat unbelievable. I mean, why pick a guy with gray streaking his hair, when Chris Evans is available to you? Maybe it's just me though...

What I particularly enjoyed about this film was the chemistry between the four of the five soldiers, and more specifically between Pooch (Columbus Short) and Jenson (Chris Evans). Chris Evans' role was probably the most fun character, what with his obsession with his niece's soccer team and the fact that he was probably the buffest computer nerd on the face of planet Earth. He also held up the comedy end of this film almost single-handedly. The soldier that I didn't enjoy was Roque, played by Idris Elba. He was basically a whiny bitch throughout the movie's entirety, and I find it difficult to develop a liking for characters like that.

And I'd also like to point out that if I were ever to go into a war-like scenario, I would take Cougar (Oscar Jaenada) as my wingman. He seriously has your back.

So on the CWeave scale of 1 to 10, I give this movie a 7.5. It had action, comedy, bastards (for real, Max is a PRICK), and lots of men. Winner, winner, chicken dinner.