"She's Out of My League" - in theaters

The main reason that I wanted to see this film is because I have a sort of crush on the lead actor, Jay Baruchel. I loved him in "Tropic Thunder" and in "I'm Reed Fish", and thought he was absolutely disgusting in "Knocked Up". But that's all beside the point.

"She's Out of My League" centers around Kirk (Baruchel), your average, run of the mill, skinny guy who works airport security in Pittsburgh. Then, a gorgeous woman named Molly accidentally leaves her cell phone at security, and before you know it, the two are an item.

I didn't find this movie totally unbelievable the way some may. I occasionally notice how some very attractive women are with not-so-attractive men, and always attributed it to the "beauty on the inside" argument. But in this film, Kirk doesn't seem to have any beauty on the inside, or at least, none that he can tell. This idea is only reinforced by his friends (who I found extremely hilarious), who constantly tell him he's not good enough for Molly. Throw in an extremely macho pilot ex-boyfriend, and voila! You have a character plagued in self doubt and insecurity and we all know what that means: movie magic.

This movie is R-rated, so you get some really good R-rated laughs out of it. There's a particular scene involving semen that literally had me squirming in my seat. In fact, Kirk is so awkward in most of his scenes with Molly that it's impossible not to squirm through those as well. But I found it all to be part of his charm, and I totally dug it. Plus, any guy that uses the expression "Raw-dogging some randoms" takes the cake in my book.

I also enjoyed Patty (played by Krysten Ritter), who is Molly's extremely bitchy best friend and business partner. Krysten seems to be carving out the "Judy Greer" niche for herself, perpetually playing the best friend and comic relief. Patty's relationship with Kirk's best friend, Stainer, is humorous simply because of their mutual hatred for the other. It's good times.

So, on the CWeave scale of 1 to 10. I give this movie a 7.5. It was offbeat, touching, and had many "guffaw" moments. And I believe that you can't ask for more than that when you purchase a movie ticket.

"Alice in Wonderland" - in theaters

I think I'm going to add Tim Burton to the list of directors whom I don't trust directing movies based upon books that I love. So far that list only has Christopher Columbus on it, but it's a growing list, dammit.

I knew going into "Alice in Wonderland" that it wasn't going to be like the book at all. I had read enough articles about it in my Entertainment Weekly to know that. But I feel as if Tim Burton just took the characters from both "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland" and "Through the Looking Glass", not to mention Lewis Carroll's poem, "The Jaberwocky", threw out the story-lines, and just came up with a plot that involved all of them.

The first major change is the fact that Alice is in her late teens/early twenties when she "returns" to "Underland" (which she mistakenly calls "Wonderland" in her first adventure there). After she falls down the rabbit hole, she finds that she must drink the potion to make her smaller, and then eat the cake to make herself bigger again. But this time, her clothes don't grow with her, and I'm pretty sure Tim Burton just wanted that poor actress to be naked and/or wearing ill-fitting costumes for the entire movie (although magically her shoes remained on her feet...). Once she finally leaves the entryway, she runs smack dab into a whole mess of characters who debate about whether or not she's the "real Alice". The rest of the plot centers around this very debate as Alice must first convince herself that she's the "real Alice".

Overall, I found the performances a bit ridiculous. Johnny Depp couldn't decide if he was English or Scottish, and didn't really come off as mad; simply weird. Helena Bonham Carter was shrill as the Red Queen, and I must agree with Entertainment Weekly when they described Anne Hathaway (who plays the White Queen) as looking like "an Italian porn star".

I also think that the title should have been different. "Alice in Wonderland" automatically makes me think of the animated Disney feature from years ago, and doesn't accurately describe the film that I just saw in theaters. It should have been titled "Alice's Return to Wonderland", as that's really what the film is about.

I saw it in regular 3D and I'm pretty glad that I didn't pay the extra for IMAX, because I would've been disappointed that I spent that much money. Even though the performances left something to be desired, if you are at all a fan of Tim Burton, then I would still go and see this film. The special effects are pretty awesome, especially in 3D.

So on the CWeave scale of 1 to 10, I rate this movie a 6.5. I probably won't own it, but I'm glad I saw it in theaters. But then again, I like Tim Burton's movies for the most part. If you're not a Burton fan, you may rate the movie lower.

Academy Awards Recap

I would like to just quickly say one thing about the Academy Awards:

SUCK IT, JAMES CAMERON.

I'm really ecstatic that Kathryn Bigelow took home the Best Director Oscar, not to mention that "The Hurt Locker" earned the Oscar for Best Picture. It just goes to show that just because a movie makes a zillion dollars at the box office (**cough** "Avatar" **cough**), it doesn't mean that it automatically deserves the biggest award out there. I think it also speaks volumes when a film gets 9 nominations, like "Avatar", but not one of them was for writing or acting. I'm just sayin'....

The acting awards came as no surprise. Mo'Nique definitely deserved her Oscar. In "Precious" she goes to a very dark place, and was rewarded accordingly. Christoph Waltz was PHENOMENAL in "Inglorious Basterds", so his was just.

I never saw the Kevin Bridges nor the Sandra Bullock films, so I can't comment on those.

Overall, the awards didn't disappoint. I loved NPH doing the first number, and Alec Baldwin and Steve Martin did a fair job at hosting (although they could've been funnier). Now that they're over, all I can think about is the batch of movies that will be next year's nominated films. Can't wait to see them!

"The Last Station" - in theaters

First off, I'd just like to state the obvious: Helen Mirren is a total bad ass.

Now that that's over with, let's get down to the business of talking about "The Last Station". As some may know, it features Oscar nominated performances by both Helen Mirren (best actress) and Christopher Plummer (best supporting actor). Both of these nominations are well-deserved, as the parts were played beautifully.

The movie is about the last year of Leo Tolstoy's (who wrote "War and Peace" and "Anna Karenina") life, seen mostly through the eyes of his new secretary, Valentin (played by the always adorable James McAvoy). Helen Mirren plays Tolstoy's wife of 48 years, who disagrees with pretty much everything Tolstoy has come to stand for. This includes the Tolstoyan movement, headed by a well-cast, absolutely revolting Paul Giamatti. It seems his character (Cherkov) wants nothing more than to make Tolstoy into an idol, one which would lead the Russian people into a new state of enlightenment. He also wants Tolstoy to sign a new will, stating that the rights to all of his books are to be given to the Russian people as a gift, making them public domain. This is where Sofya (Mirren) and Cherkov disagree the most, as Sofya only wants to secure the welfare of her family through retaining the rights (and the profits) to Tolstoy's work.

While the bulk of the movie revolves around this argument, there are also a number of small, poignant moments that are littered throughout that tell an even greater story about how love changes our lives. And in the end, that's what Tolstoy wants everyone to know: it's all about love.

The only issue that I had with this film were the accents. Most of the actors didn't even attempt to use a Russian accent. Mirren could have been playing the Queen of England (again) with the lilt she was using. McAvoy and Giamatti tried, but didn't really succeed. I just thought that it was funny that this film was about one of, if not the, greatest Russian author of his time, and no one thought about using his native tongue (or at least the twang that went with it). But as far as issues go, I'll let the language slide, since the rest of the movie was so well done.

At times humorous and heartfelt, sad and infuriating, "The Last Station" was nothing that I expected, and I loved it. So on the CWeave scale, I rate this movie a 9. Close to brilliance, but I gotta knock off a point for the accent thing...

"Shutter Island" - in theaters

I really wish that Leonardo DiCaprio would act in a nice romantic comedy. Why is it that he always has to play such complex, damaged characters? Seriously Leo... take a Xanax and make me laugh for crying out loud.

That being said, I actually did enjoy "Shutter Island". I was apprehensive to go and see it, mostly because I thought it was going to be more of a horror film, and we all know how I feel about horror films. But, I was pleasantly surprised. I only had to plug my ears twice (which is what I do when I get scared... it's weird, I know). The rest of the film is simply mysterious and suspenseful, and frankly, very entertaining.

Probably what I loved most about this entire film was Leonardo's come-and-go Boston accent, which he honed in "The Departed", and got to drag out into this film. He plays Teddy Daniels, a U.S. Marshall called to a mental facility on the aptly titled Shutter Island. A prisoner has escaped, and it's his and his new partner's (Mark Ruffalo, who's always such a delight to watch on screen in my opinion) duty to find the missing woman. But, being a Scorsese film, things are never that simple, and Teddy is soon investigating the hospital itself as well as facing his own personal demons. He has a rollicking case of PTSD from his time as a soldier in World War 2. That being said, the audience is treated to many flashbacks of Teddy as a soldier, wandering through a concentration camp, coming across corpse after corpse and shooting German prison guards. It's slightly horrific and gory, but necessary to understand the demons of Teddy's past and present.

I enjoyed the slight moment of Jackie Earle Hayley, who plays a prisoner in the dangerous Ward C of the hospital. He is one creepy dude, but his tete-a-tete with DiCaprio is fabulous.

The last line of the film has really stuck with me since leaving the theater this morning, so much so that I'm still thinking about it now. I'm tempted to write it here, but while I don't think it would tell much, I don't want to spoil the ending.

So, on the CWeave scale, I would rank this film an 8. While I don't think I'll own it, I do recommend that everyone see it. I promise, it's not as scary as it looks. And let's face it: you can't go wrong with Scorsese. Or at least most of the time you can't...

"Percy Jackson and the Olympians - The Lightening Thief" in theaters

I was in Florida this past weekend, visiting my sister when I went to see this movie. First off, I'd like to say that I am in love with this book series. The author, Rick Riordan, works Greek mythology into present day life with such ease and believability, not to mention a very sharp wit that all ages can enjoy. So, needless to say, I was pumped about going to see this movie.

As a film, I enjoyed it immensely. There were good action sequences, it was quite humorous, and also heart-warming. However, it differed radically from the book. For one, two main characters were left out, which makes doing any sequels a bit troublesome, as one of these characters is quite important in the later novels.

Percy was played by Logan Lerman, who, as my sister pointed out, looks, talks, and has the mannerisms of Zac Efron 3 years ago. And ever since she said that, that's all I can think of when I look at him. However, Logan did an admirable job. It was clear that he spent a lot of time training with weapons, and the chemistry between him, Annabeth, and Grover was good. What he did lack was the sense of humor that is so evident in the books. In the film, pretty much all of the funny lines were given to Grover. Brandon T. Jackson (i.e. Alpa Chino from "Tropic Thunder"), did a great job as Grover, and his comedic timing was spot on.

Annabeth had a certain air of smugness and self-righteousness about her that Percy chipped away at throughout the film, which is generally how it went in the books. And just like the book, the filmmakers didn't give you any sort of release for all of that sexual tension.

I have an issue with the director choice of Christopher Columbus. While yes, he is very accomplished at what he does, I find that he tries to make everything almost too family friendly. Case in point: the movie version of "Rent". The fact that he took R-rated material and made it into a PG-13 rated movie took away a lot from what the original play was about. But I'm not delving into that here.

My biggest pet peeve during this film was that Zeus decreed that all Gods were not to have any contact with their children. I thought that this was an effort by the director to make the gods seem like they weren't assholes. But that isn't sticking to the roots of Greek mythology, which pretty much state that yes, the gods were assholes. They made their kids fight their battles for them, and a lot of the time, the kids didn't want anything to do with the gods. In the Percy Jackson books, it goes along the same lines. Zeus didn't decree anything of the sort. What he, Poseidon, and Hades did do was create a pact that said they wouldn't have any mortal children after World War 2, because WW2 was the result of the skirmishes between them. The fact that Percy Jackson exists in the first place is a HUGE deal in the books, but not so much in the film.

But I digress...

I've learned that you can't go into an adapted film with the idea that it's going to be exactly like the book it's based on. So, as a whole, I still enjoyed this film for what it was. So on the CWeave scale, I give this movie a 7.5. I'd probably see it again in the theaters, and it will certainly become a part of my collection when it comes out on DVD.

The Academy Awards

Even though this is technically a movie review site, I have to put in my two sense about the Academy Award nominations. I know that they happened over a week ago, but I took a long time to dwell on what I was going to say about them. And here it is:

Basically it all boils down to the fact that if "Avatar" wins Best Picture or James Cameron wins for Best Director, I'm going to lose a little bit more faith in the Academy. Yes, "Avatar" was an epic movie, with dazzling special effects and millions of dollars at the box office, but seriously? As a friend of mine put it, the storyline is basically a retelling of "Cowboys and Indians". The dialogue is weak and corny in a lot of areas, and Cameron really needs to learn how to edit. A shorter film would have delivered just as hard of a punch.

And Cameron for Best Director? I'm sorry, but one shouldn't get an Oscar simply because they know how to use a computer. That's what the Visual Effects Award is for. I'm just saying...

Comparing "Avatar" to the other Best Picture nominees like "The Hurt Locker" (which is my personal favorite for winning) or "Precious" or hell, even "District 9", it falls short. I just hope the Academy can look past the millions of dollars and see that the story behind the blue skin doesn't add up to much.

And that's my take. Love it or hate it? Leave me a comment, and we can discuss.